Our first full day home. Morning was spent with the littles doing school while Daughter in Love and J sorted through tons of clothes. The back of the excursion was over filled with her stuff. Most of it is OK if she was a size small. She is a size medium/large both top and bottom. She so muchly has my build it is funny. (poor kid!) MN was most helpful in pointing out she didn't loose near as many clothes as they did. I didn't bother pointing out that many of her keeper clothes won't really get to be worn because they fit like a second skin. They are just acceptable if they are the right size. She and I went over the "questionable" but wanted to keep. She didn't like it when I would ask if she would be comfortable wearing that for Jesus?... 
I want her to be a Godly Young Woman I would remind her.
We sat on the swing and talked some about what she expected in a family. I told her I was sure she was overwhelmed with everything. That I didn't know what she expected with us. She said she really expected it to be much like it is. This kinda surprised me. I ask her and you still wanted to come. She nodded and said she needs this. She wants this. Then we talked about the real J that is hidden behind the J that wants to fit in. The J I have caught glimpse of. The one I want to get to know but that I'm not even sure she knows. She said she does know her. I ask her to tell me about her. She said there wasn't much to tell. She is shy and scared. Loves God, and wants to be loved for who she is not what she looks like. Tears were rolling down her face at this. Of course I hugged her! Yea tears here too! We talked some more and went back to life around here.
I gave her a school assignment. She had to write in her Journal and read chapter 1 of "Do Hard Things". She procrastinated on doing it. I did point out once that I didn't care if she did it outside or on the deck or where. She later ask if she could read her book instead of the one I wanted. I ask her if she wanted to swim. She did... 
guess you better read mine then and write. She did the pouty lip, I did the pouty lip, she smiled and shortly started it.
Late this evening T and J made MN cry. They had been ugly to her because she wanted to wear her boys swim trunks and t shirt instead of a swim suit and t shirt. She didn't come tattling but was just sad faced and when we said something she melted and told us. Since T swims all time in shorts and a T I knew what was going on. They had to get out of the pool. I confronted them and they admitted they had said something, but they "weren't being ugly." They lost swimming. I talked to each one separately. Made each one cry separately. T and I talked about following and choosing what is right. What she has been taught. I ask her if she knew she hurt MN's feelings. She said not when she said it. I said but before you came down stairs did you? Yes. We talked some more about how we treat people etc. I ask her if she had to stand before Jesus today how did she think He would feel about it. She was blubbering and said "He wouldn't like it, I was mean." She really seemed sad she had hurt her sister.
Then it was J's turn. Different approach! I talked about how when MN came she came much like J thinking her body was meant to be shown off as a sex object. She has worked hard and it has been very painful to learn that she has worth. She doesn't have to grow up to be someones sex object. That it is her body and she has the right to keep it pure and protect it. As we talked about this area and what my hopes and dreams were for her. That she would be a Godly Woman, that she would be an awesome wife, or teacher or what ever God calls her to be. That she would be a wonderful parent her whole body language changed from leary to a puddle. I held her and she cried and we talked some more about how special she was and how worthy she is. She then ask me to call MN over. She hugged her and cried some more and apologized and ask her to forgive her. When MN did she thanked her. Still hanging on to her.
All in all I think it was a great day! MN is the one struggling the most. Mainly because she is so wise in so many ways and sees so much that she doesn't approve of. She wants to wave a magic wand over J and heal all her hurts. She want to help J like I helped her. Yea, she is a bit pushy about it. I did tell J if she gets to bugging her yell out! Her heart is in the right place, she is just pushy.
Continue to pray on the school issue. It really is an area I am struggling to lay down to God. The world has had her for 16 years! It's time for her to have family/God time to be allowed to mature in Christ, not more of the world. I know God can work on her no matter where she is. I know He can protect her no matter where she is. Maybe I am selfish in not wanting to share her right now with the world. I want to shelter her and mother her and teach her God's way.
Continue to pray for meshing of our family. It is meshing well because of every one's prayers. MN especially needs some extra prayers as she looses her "big bossy sister" roll. J is all that also and older
Hope everyone has a blessed tomorrow! I am off to bed! It is hard to write right now during the day, with meeting every one's extra needs as we adjust.
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Have a great weekend! 
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